I Cover My Hair NOT My Brain!

السلام عليكم

Hey Lovelies! I hope you are all doing well. إن شاء الله

Before I start I would like to apologise for not posting, in over a week. SORRY GUYS 😦 I have been super busy. A close friend of mine got married. YHYH! She’s the first out of the “clan” to get married, so you can imagine the stress and all excitement. I had 3 functions to attend; the Mehndi night, Wedding reception and the Walima. There was so much to do, but not enough time! We even had a few mishaps, but thankfully, no trips to the emergency room was required, but it came close, let’s just say “Look where you’re going, don’t text and walk at the same time”. (But that’s another story for another day)

Someone of you might be wondering, why am I telling you all this. I have a valid reason I promise. Something incredible happened and I thought I’d share it with you all.

Let’s rewind back to 6th months ago to the engagement. At the engagement there was a heated discussion between a group of women and bunch of my friends. Normally, I don’t really engage myself in heated discussions with people on any political or religious issue. I think it is a waste of time because the listener is not really listening to understand, but merely to know exactly which point they have to retaliate back to. But that day, somehow unknowingly, I was dragged into this conversation.

It started off with the group of women making remarks about “people who wear the Hijab saying they are uneducated and are a disgrace to the community” as they uttered these words I noticed the anger and frustration on all my friends faces, their faces went from happy to sad real quick. Whereas I was not so bothered; all this was rather amusing for me. It amused me that people still seem think this way in the 21st century. But than I remembered something my parents taught me they always said “Everyone is entitled to their own opinion, their opinion might be different to yours, but it doesn’t make it wrong”, we should always value others opinion even if we disagree with them.  I thought to myself it’s their mentality not mines so why does it even matter to me what they think.

My friends, however beg to differ they thought so otherwise, they started to argue saying they were just narrow minded people who needed to wake up and  see the real world. Things were getting out of control, harsh words where being exchanged it wasn’t a pretty sight to be in. By this point there was a little group of people gathered round us all listening. I was so embarrassed at the way my friends where behaving it wasn’t like them. This was no way to speak to someone especial elders doesn’t matter if they were wrong their still older and deserve respect. As I calmed my friends down, telling them is was neither the right time nor the right place to have this discussion and that they should apologise and so they did.

As we were walking away a woman stopped me, she asked me why I didn’t say anything. I smiled and said there wasn’t anything for me to say. She said, but no of the other girls actually wore the Hijab and they felt so angry about what was said. But you on the other hand wear the Hijab, but said nothing. I could feel all eyes were on me; everyone went quite and started staring at me I could feel my heart pounding and my palms sweating. I was not expecting this I was put on the spot and didn’t know what to say or how to react. She asked me what my view was about all this was. I told her I disagreed with what her friends and her said, I told her I respect their opinion. But I had an option of my own. I said , “NO! I do not think you can define someone who chooses to wears the Hijab or dress modestly, as uneducated. I explained to them that Islam teaches us to gain knowledge and to always strive to be a better person. I also asked them a simple question; I asked, “if you saw a book with a plain boring cover would you still read it”. “YES of course we would, you cannot judge a book by its cover” they replied. So than I asked how can you judge someone because of what they wear and how they dress? What makes you think a person who wears the Hijab and dresses modestly is uneducated? I went on telling them Muslim women across the world who wear the Hijab are in very respectable professions such as; doctors, nursing, teaching and engineering does that make them uneducated. Hijab does not prevent us from educating ourselves it. Its ones thought that does. That being said, I smiled at them and offered them some chocolates (I had a tray of sweets on my hand, expect me to be near the chocolates) and walked away.

Coming back to the present day (Wedding day). I could see the women sitting on the far end table all talking and laughing really loudly, but there was something different, strange in fact about them. I soon realised two of women were missing out of the group, that’s odd I thought their always all together , maybe the others couldn’t come. I hope there okay I thought to myself. BUT than I heard a voice say looking for us. I turned around and saw two women standing in front of me I didn’t recognise them, but I didn’t want to be rude, so I asked how they are and even complimented them. Until one of them said you don’t recognise us do you. I told them I was sorry, I didn’t recognise them I even suggested they had mistaken  me for someone else, but they laughed and said “Nope we are pretty sure your the girl we want to speak to.” They introduced themselves  telling me they were the women who made remarks about “people who wear the Hijab are uneducated” they went on explaining about what I said had an impact on them and made them look at things from a different point of view. They told me they did their own research, about the importance of hijab which lead them to embraced the Hijab and dress modestly, they informed me that they have only been wearing the hijab for a few months now, but they felt happy and content with life. I cannot explain how happy I was when they told me this, the feeling is just indescribable.

I learnt a valuable lesson that day!

© Hijabi-Online


83 thoughts on “I Cover My Hair NOT My Brain!

  1. Laura P. Schulman, MD, MA says:

    That is so beautiful! You lived your principles of modesty by behaving respectfully in a situation where you easily could have jumped into the argument, which would have actually led to more conflict. Instead you chose the”high road” and quietly listened, which earned you respect among your friends, and you expressed your opinion when asked. I’m sure this gained you huge respect among your friends, and thus quietly showed them that modesty of speech and action can spread intelligence, not ignorance.

    A true story from the Jewish perspective: in Orthodox Judaism we believe that the hair is a very holy and powerful thing, not to be viewed except by the husband. Most Jewish women cover their hair completely after marriage. A patient of mine refused to cover her hair, and complained that her sister was always bugging her about it. Now, this patient was coming to me because she couldn’t get pregnant. I had a strong feeling that it was because she refused to cover her hair. I didn’t say anything about it, but I did call her sister and said, stop bugging her about covering her hair and let’s see what happens. Meanwhile the sister who did cover got pregnant with number four! Two months later my patient showed up for her appointment with her hair covered. One month later she was pregnant! Then she believed, and now has three. So, there is great power in humility, and letting go of ego can bring great joy.

    Liked by 4 people

    • Silent Perception says:

      Thank you 🙂 I think its always best to think before we speak I could have reacted the way my friends in fact that would have been the easier option but that wouldn’t have sloved anything it would have made matters worse. We all learnt a lesson that day we learnt the true meaing of Hijab. Hijab doesn’t only mean to cover and conceal the body but also the mind behaving respectful towards others especially elders can have a great impact. Its is important to be modest both internally and externally.

      Your story is really inspiring. ☺ I love how even though we come from two different religion we have similar beliefs about covering or the hair.

      Liked by 2 people

      • Laura P. Schulman, MD, MA says:

        Yes, before I learned about my own religion I went to Quaker Meeting for five years. If you’re not familiar with Quakers, they are a religion that broke off from Christianity in the 1600s and came to America to escape persecution. They are called Quakers because they “quake” (shake hard, like an earthquake) before God. They believe that there is “that of God in every person.” So even though people might have different beliefs or ways of life, they still have the spark of God within them, the potential to do what is good and righteous. I think the problem has always been, ever since there have been humans, that sometimes people get confused about what God wants. In my belief, we simple humans are not smart enough to say “God wants us to invent our own religion.” We were made the way we are for a reason, although we don’t always get to know that reason. Our mission is to be the best that we can, and follow our Holy Books. You have Q’ran, I have Torah. God made me Jewish, He made you Muslim. We don’t have to hate or kill each other, because God made us for His own purpose. Just as Abraham/Ibrahim had two sons, he is your Father and mine. We are sisters.

        Liked by 7 people

  2. Iliyas Burnett says:

    I would have probably reacted just as your friends did loool, how can you openly insult your ‘sisters’ right in front of them suggesting that because they were hijab they’re uneducated?! Ajeeb (strange) and incredibly bad manners from people who are supposed to be older and wiser. If they wouldn’t have turned to you seeking your opinion, then you wouldn’t have defended the hijab and all Muslim sisters who wear it, educated or not; it’s by Allah’s grace that your opinion was sought, and when it was you answered beautifully ما شاء الله
    It may be that your soft approach mixed with the youthful passion and pride of your fellow sisters was the potent remedy which caused them to feel empowered and confident enough to wear it. They were probably shocked to see younger sisters respond to their ignorant insult so vehemently, because they’re ‘elders’ they probably imagined they’d just keep their mouths shut. Muslims are proud of their Islamic identity now, and they probably felt quite ashamed that they were not proud enough to wear this great Islamic symbol that is ‘hijab’. May Allah give you and your friends the reward for every day and night they were hijab. اللَّهُم آمين

    Liked by 7 people

  3. bilalsidiki says:

    That’s amazing SubhanAllah.

    Thank Allah for making you a part of His Rahma that he bestowed upon those two.

    May Allah bless with the blessings of this world and the akhirah. Ameen 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  4. Aaliyah Zahra says:

    Masha Allah the way you reacted to the situation is exactly how the Prophet reacted : with Sabr. And the result in both cases have had an impact. I wish almost all Muslim ummah had the same sabr and dignity in such situations but unfortunately we get in the defence mode.

    Liked by 4 people

  5. livingreality1014 says:

    you r more than awesum abidah !!
    m loving ds lyk anythn
    i wanted you to be my side a week ago when i was harrased by sum bloggers nly bcuz i tried to explain dm smthn they dint udrstand.
    those bloggers were swearing on our prophet so i coudnt control myself nd tried to explain bt unfortunately all of them humiliated me..i realy wished u wer wd me that tym.
    but urs is a brilliant post …keep going.:)

    Liked by 4 people

    • Silent Perception says:

      Thank You 🙂
      Sorry to hear that you had to go through something as awful as that some people are not worth arguing with, they don’t even want to understand what you trying to say or explain, but are more interested in what they have to say. Its not worth wasting your time for such ignorant people.
      Hahah and I doubt I’m the awesome one 😜 your so much more awesome than me i love reading your blogs their amazing.

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Carol Balawyder says:

    What a fun stor, SubhanAllah. I have often said that I envied women wearing the Hijab, especially on bad hair days! 🙂
    Unfortunately today many people still judge a book by its cover. I like fashion and tend to notice women wearing some beautiful hijab’s. Perhaps you can one day post on how to wear a Hijab. 🙂 All very interesting to learn.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Enny Cole. says:

    Wow! I really love the fact that you impacted lives there… God bless you. I am always inquisitive about Islam as a religion and I can say it is a unique one though I don’t understand most of it. Cheers

    Liked by 2 people

  8. milliethom says:

    A lovely story with a valid lesson for everyone. We should all repsect each others’ opinions – and certainly never judge a book by its cover. Too many people are eager to make insulting remarks without understanding what they are critcising, or the facts involved.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. kreemer says:

    You write honestly, and very well. Your subject, the Hijab, is interesting. You approach it though, exclusively from the teachings, and those teachings, in the context of safety. What has happened in my country, is that the Hijab has come to mean concealment, not modesty, malevolence not well-meaning. For us the discussion has become simply one of honest representation and safety. Terror has used the hijab to steal our identities (passports) and use them elsewhere, and to hide the identity of the people terrorising us.

    The sad thing is, without a face, terror has then been equated to Islam and not the terrorist behind it.

    Today we’ve reached a compromise. The hijab is the domain of Muslim women and those who choose it. However, in public spaces, everyone has the right to see directly, everyone else around them.

    May the world come to its senses, and Peace prevail.

    The Peaceful must stand together.

    I very much enjoy your insightful and thoughtful blog.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Awoken With Poetry says:

    What you did was amazingly humbling. I don’t really know how I would react, but I am sure how you reacted was right. And you are right. People have opinions. They have their reasons as to why they have those reasons. Sometimes it has to do with ignorance or misunderstanding. Or maybe even inexperience. This was awesome!

    Liked by 1 person

  11. orenjii says:

    Subhanallah ukhti, its strange that nowadays women wearing less clothes, hotpant’s, bikini’s were called modern and more educated than we are as moslems which always wearing polite clothes, closing our aurat. Hijab is our obligation towards Al Qur’an and it’s for protecting our women.

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Lala Rukh says:

    “Everyone is entitled to their own option, their option might be different to yours, but it doesn’t make it wrong” This line sums up your whole post beautifully. I really loved your open minded thoughts. And I love Shaadi functions 😛
    JazakAllah !

    Liked by 1 person

  13. Stephanae V. McCoy says:

    This is a beautiful post. You made an impact on these women and I’m sure it wasn’t just what you said or how you said it but the way you handled yourself in the situation.To not be drawn into a heated debate but remaining calm while respectfully explaining your point of view showed strength of character that made a lasting impression. Good job!

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Loubnanya says:

    Sister you are AMAZING !
    Your response was perfect MASHA’ALLAH. The fact that it made wonder the other girls prove that. I think i wouldn’t have so much Sabr in a similar situation, although i’m everyday afraid that something like this happens to me (since islamophobia has become really common here in France.)
    Anyway, your post is excellent, reading it we don’t except such a beautiful end masha’Allah. Jazak’Allah khayr for sharing this story.

    Liked by 1 person

  15. puresoulwidimaan says:

    Sub haan Allah beautiful story.. May Allah swt reward you for changing others opinion about the hijab.. I myself started to wear the hijab but I get so many bad comments and stares but allhumdillah I feel so beautiful wearing the black Jilbab .. Allah swt gives us choices to learn and to listen to his words.. Everything even the beauty should be covered for it should be only for your husband to see …

    Liked by 1 person

  16. Forestwoodfolkart says:

    “We should always value others opinion even if we disagree with them” – Wise words you wrote. I think the world would be a much happier, more inclusive place if others shared this opinion. Prejudice exists in many places, and your post helps dispel incorrect impressions.

    Liked by 1 person

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